The Wait for Mr. Right

I'm usually very private about my personal life but since starting my blog I've felt more compelled to open up and be transparent with my readers. 


Growing up I would say that I wasn't the "it" girl that everyone wanted to go after and I certainly wasn't approachable. In my eyes I was too dark, not developed in the areas that other girls were and I expected way too much. For many years I despised my dark skin and struggled to accept it. I remember looking at lighter complexion girls thinking "If I was lighter I could totally wear that color too."  My sister who's much lighter than me, always seemed to get most of the attention. It was no shocker though -- My sister is gorgeous, built like a model and to top it off she was born with beautiful red hair. Whether I liked it  or not...this is how it was. 

High School... The wait begins

At this point in my life, I was finally at a point where I accepted my flaws and found ways to love them even more each day. Soon I entered into my first true relationship. Hence the word true and not serious. It was my first time experiencing a breakup and experiencing having a partner who wasn't faithful. I knew from that point on that I didn't just want someone who filled up my time but actually brought something into my life and planned on staying. If I didn't see a future with that person, they couldn't even get the time of day in my eyes. See here's the thing -- I had spent so much time loving myself that I just couldn't settle for anyone.


Here's to some of the best years I'll remember of my life. I finally was off on my own and headed off to college four hours away from what I called home! Homesick? Not at all! I loved every thing about going away to school (Okay maybe not everything) but for the most part everything was great. I was never a "turn up" type of person. My idea of fun was enjoying myself with close friends and heading back to my space. In the beginning, I attended almost every college party thrown and was pretty known around campus but I was still alone. After being alone for so long, I remember saying one day to my mentor "I think I need to lower my standards a bit" and I'll never forget the moment she looked at me and said "Never lower your standards for anyone or anything. You can adjust them but never lower them". 

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4 years into college...

I remember enrolling in a speech class one Fall semester. Unlike most speech classes this one was more hands on. I was a Theatre major so a speech class for us consisted of memorizing monologues, breaking down and analyzing pieces, learning how to articulate and so much more. In this class with me, sat my friends for many years whom I had meet through the program and also sat this guy that was super quiet. He was very attractive but I was giving someone else attention at the time and wasn't the type that could handle both. If you've ever been around Theatre students before then I'm sure you know just how animated we can be. He stood out to me immediately. Of course because of his looks but also because he wasn't the usual Theatre student I was used to encountering in my courses. He was actually a communication major and had the option to take the course towards his graduation requirements.

Everyday like clockwork we would come into class, not acknowledge each other and head our separate ways after. The semester started to come to an end and I remember being given an assignment to select a monologue to recite to the class as our final test. I honestly can't remember what I picked but I do remember what he selected as his. At the time, I didn't know that Will Smith was literally one of his inspirations which makes sense now because he chose a piece from "Seven Pounds" to recite as his final. The instructor randomly selected me to be on book for him just encase he called out for lines. Of course I didn't turn down the offer. He ended up doing really good but stumbled over a few lines. He sits down and I finally speak my first words to him...

"You know your just have to slow down a bit" and that was it...

Yes. That was it.

A few days later the course was over and we went our separate ways for Christmas break. One day I received a friend request on Facebook from the guy that had never said a word to me and thought to myself "This guy never said a word to me in class" but without hesitation I accepted him. I told myself that I would message him and see how he did in the course once I got a chance. 

A few weeks had passed and I remembered that I never checked up on him. I decided to send him a message at like 12am and just as quick as I sent it -- he responded.